Born, raised, and lived in Los Angeles my entire life (June 1st, 1970----I had to be a Gemini to be this crazy, right?), I started writing adult humor parody lyrics in the summer of 1999, after spontaneously singing something one day while driving with my good friend and former band mate in our eventual adult humor parody music group, Smashing Rumpkin. He cracked up at whatever parody I was singing (I can't even remember it now!) and said that he also likes doing that. He was also an aspiring regular song writer at the time, as well as a great musician and singer, so, the next thing I knew, I'd have a new original parody on my voice mail every week from him, it seemed. I had to follow suit, and the next thing you knew, we had each come up with several great songs (many of which are on the site right now) on our own. Then, one magical day, we collaborated on our first song, "Douching With Listerine" (based on Sarah McLaughlin's "Building the Mystery"---I still don't have this song written out beyond a verse and chorus, so it's not on the whatfreaks site, but you can hear it on my CD; my apologies!), and, eventually, we had about 20 songs written, so we decided to form our Smashing Rumpkin group. Our first gig was a 30 minute TV appearance on a Public Access Network show, and we really had a tight performance, so our next goal was to have a LIVE show in front of an audience. A few months later, in late 2001, our dream became a reality. It was, at the time, the best day of my adult life. The audience LOVED it, and we even got the entire room of about 60 people to sing along with our "Cum With My Dildo" ("Come To My Window"). After another live show at the same LA cabaret theatre/restaurant and another appearance on the same Public Access Network show (which was even better than the previous one), we had our biggest moment (and still the FUNNEST day of my adult life) as a featured act for a big LA radio station's annual variety show, 95.5 KLOS' "Viva Libido 2002" in front of about 1500 people, many of whom were waving lighters during our slowed down version of "Cock in Your Wife" ("Time of Your Life/Good Riddance"). We didn't even have a website or CD at this time, but, after hearing from the radio station about a week later that several listeners called up asking if we did, that became our next step (please check it out at www.smashingrumpkin.com). Unfortunately, our next live show at a local sports bar didn't go so well thanks to a poor turn out and drama from my partner's ex-fiance making a drunken fool out of herself, so he gave up.

Smashing Rumpking may have died (though I continued to sell some CDs and still have the website afloat, as earlier mentioned), but my love of adult humor parody music DIDN'T!! I have since written many, many new songs and finished several of the ones my buddy and I had only partially written. I go karoke singing almost every week and often, depending on how liberal the venue is, still sing them, usually to an unsuspecting audience. I have found that my karaoke audiences can generally be divided into 3 categories: those who arn't paying attention and have NO idea that I'm changing the words, those who are mortally offended by my new words (mainly good looking women, unfortunately---I guess they don't want to hear me singing "I Totally Shit When I Fart" or "My Piss is on Fire" or even "Because Your Clit is on My Lips"), and those who think it's the funniest shit they have ever heard and who can't believe I'm not doing this in Vegas as a lounge act! In my "real" life, I work as a physical therapist, mainly doing geriatric rehabilitation at a nursing home, and I'm also a fine artist (though I haven't done much drawing lately in favor of my NEW love of writing these goofy songs).

So keep up your votes and comments (even if they're bad---honesty IS the best policy, and I can always just tell you to go F yourself---lol). And please visit my other website to hear my CD. I'd love to send you a copy! Oh, I forgot to mention that I also have 2 other songs on youtube right now, "Hung Just Like a Mule" ("Hungry Like the Wolf") and "Nipple Hair" ("I'll Be There"----I actually wrote this about 3 weeks before Michael Jackson passed away---great timing, huh? I'm sure he's looking down and laughing as I know how much he loved Weird Al's work). There must be a reason why I'm on this site, as I ACCIDENTALLY found it years ago while google searching my name for the first time. I had NO idea it existed, but I saw something on Google about a parody song with MY name in the lyrics! ("I Shot the Parrot, but I Didn't Kill Miss Blakely"). Why the author of that parody used my full name in his song is beyond me, but thank God he did, as it led me to the other site (amiright.com), which got me on the path to whatfreaks.com.