L'il Willie There once was a well-hung hillbilly,
Who called his huge swelled hunk 'Li'l Willie.'
His young daughter Mildred
Let him into her bed
Each night, and then he would fill Millie.
Submitted by: John A. Barry | The Lady From France There once was a lady from France,
She took a ride on a train by chance,
The Engineer fucked her,
So did the Conductor,
And the brakeman shit in his pants. Submitted by: Glenn |
Lady From Rome There once was a lady from Rome
Who was fucked in the ass by a gnome
She was nimble and quick
When she sat on his dick
His shortcomings were worth writing home Submitted by: Tim | The Lady From Wheeling I once knew a lady from wheeling,
She was so drunk she was reeling,
She fell on her back, and opened her crack,
And pissed all over the ceiling. Submitted by: Glenn |
Lady Named Dinah There once was a lady named Dinah,
She stuck dynamite in her vagina,
Her titties landed in Timbuktu,
And her asshole landed in China. Submitted by: Glenn | The Landlord A landlord who hailed from the gentry
Approached a male tenant on bent knee
And said, 'Let me suck it,
And I will deduct it,
What you pay--you can live here rent-free.'
Submitted by: John A. Barry |
Lapidary There once was an old lapidary,
Who took a just-jizzed lap o' Mary.
But this old stonecutter
Preferred his bone butter
Directly, from a lap o' Larry.
Submitted by: John A. Barry | Large Financial Instrument Said the banker, "My dear, I'll invest
In your venture if you will ingest
A quite large deposit,"
Then her tightened jaws split
And his instrument made ingress.
Submitted by: John A. Barry |
Lass from Bastogne There once was a man from Bastogne,
Who came on a sleeping lass, prone.
She had her clothes up,
And when she woke up,
She found that she'd had her ass boned.
Submitted by: John A. Barry | Lassie from Tarse There was a young lassie from Tarse,
whose virginal claim was a farce.
Tho' her cherry intact,
She loved the sex act...
You could drive a damned truck up her arse. Submitted by: Tobu |
Laura There was a first lady named Laura
Whose good friends praised her smiling aura.
Turns out, she was happy
'Cause her tongue's in nappy
Pubes of a big bulldyke named Nora.
Submitted by: John A. Barry | The Leprechaun A sly Leprechaun nicknamed Mickey
With his dickie was pretty tricky.
So he came and he went,
Having several times spent,
Before she knew he'd had a quickie.
Submitted by: John A. Barry |
A Lesbian Girl From Rangoon A lesbian girl from Rangoon
Took a gay lad to her room.
they had a great fight
Lasting all through the night
About how and with what and to whom.
Submitted by: AjanDick | The Lezzie Life There once was a lezzie named Kelsey,
She dated a girl from Chelsea.
They played all the day,
Ate lots of...hay,
And never met anyone elsey. Submitted by: Maria and Kelsey |
Lieberkracks A guy from Wisconsin, a cheesehead
Enjoyed his heifer's hole where's she's bred.
But sometimes liked his pud
In a mouth with no cud,
So said to his wife, "Give me, please, head." Submitted by: John A. Barry | Lil Maria There once was a Lil Maria,
She liked to eat lots of tortilla.
Her eyes were so brown,
That no one would frown,
If she ate and had bad diarrhea. Submitted by: Maria and Kelsey |
Limerick #2 There once was a writer named John
Who went on and on, on and on
His forte’ you see
Was prolificity
His parodies outnumbered songs!
Submitted by: Pair o' D's | Limerick for Josh Kane's songs There once was a man named Hinckley
Whose actions did certainly stinkley.
He is such a pagan
That he tried to kill Reagan
To impress Jodie Foster, I thinkley. Submitted by: Marty McFly |
The Lonely Barbarian There once was a lonely barbarian
With a penis too heavy for carryin'
She tried to be sweet
And suck on his meat
But she was a vegetarian Submitted by: Tim | Lord There was a young lady named Jeannie
Whose Dad was a terrible meanie
He fashioned a hatch
And a latch for her snatch
She could only be had by Houdini Submitted by: After Dark |
The Lord The lord, a member of the gentry,
Grew tired of exchanging pleasantries
With his haughty class,
So he sought out an ass
For his member in the peasantry.
Submitted by: John A. Barry | Lord There was a young man from Belgrave
Who kept a dead whore in a cave
He said I admit
I'm a bit of a shit
But think of the money I save Submitted by: After Dark |
lou is a loser I really think lou is quite thick
He may be as smart as a brick
His parodies suck
And he's hung like a duck
And frankly, I think he sucks dick Submitted by: malcolm higgins | The Lousy Limerick Writers These limericks are as bad as they get
Like an illiterate off-tune duet
To come up with such shit
Simply requires a twit
Whos computer can connect to the net
Submitted by: Sarcastic Submitter |
Lumber Jack The lumberjack often can't quell it.
His girlfriend watches her man swell it.
"Take a look at this stand!
Won’t you please take your hand
And chop at it until you fell it!"
Submitted by: John A. Barry | Lurking Pervert There once was a pervert who lurked
Outside bedroom windows and jerked.
He once watched his spouse
Getting fucked in their house
By their dog, and his hand overworked.
Submitted by: John A. Barry |
Lydia There once was a woman named Lydia
Who, for some money, would pity ya
I offered her praise
'My! Real mayonnaise?'
But she said, 'No, it's just my chlamydia' Submitted by: Hugh G. Rection |
