"When you see a big guy and you dream of Brown Eye
That means you're gay
When the waiter brings wine and you want his behind
That means you're gay

Hear all day- dude you're gay, dude you're gay
And you'll say, ""Hey big fella"".
Asses say- come and play, come and play
Hairy men, they all smell-a

When a dude's lookin cool and his glance makes you drool
That means you're gay
When a new guy you meet fills your crotch up with heat
You've got chub

When you have a wet dream and it's really not
About a girl, hey
Don't you see, Can't you see, that between you and me
That means you're gay

That means you're gay.... That means you're gay
Big fella...

If you're sitting at school and some dude makes you drool
That means you're gay
If the thought of mens' feet seems like a special treat
That you'd love

When you have a wet dream.... but it's not
About a chick.... hey
Can't you see, Won't you see, that if you're asking me
I'd say you're gay...
That means you're gay!"