Song Parodies -> Blood Nose
"Where The Wild Roses Grow" Based on the performance by Nick Cave/Kylie Minogue
"Blood Nose" Parody by DC Evenhuis
"Where The Wild Roses Grow" might have given Kylie credibility, but my version is more suitable for Nick cave to sing as a duet with Courtney Love, to whom he once gave a valium, in exchange for a kiss.
NICK:The first time I saw her,
I knew right away
That she would be next on my list.
She was ripe as a plum,
With a really nice bum.
I'd have loved to seduce her
But I was too pissed.
COURTNEY:When he crawled up to me
In that sleazy old bar,
I said, "Man, who the hell do you think that you are?
You're as pissed as a fart!
But I guess it's a start.
We can sort it all out in the back of my car!"

And he called me the wild rose.
He could never remember my name!
It was all of those drugs, I suppose.
He could never remember my name.

NICK:On the 2nd day, I brought her a valium.
Her nerves were so bad, she was getting on mine.
And I asked if she knew where the wild roses grew.
It's a really good spot, if you're that way inclined.
COURTNEY:I said, "Thanks for the pill and come in if you will.
It's much warmer inside, as I'm sure you'll agree.
We'll go down to that river.
I'll stand and deliver.
I'll show you just how bloody wild I can be!"

And he called me the wild rose.
He could never remember my name!
It was all of those drugs, I suppose.
He could never remember my name.

NICK:On the 3rd day, I took her to the river.
We had lots of sex and we drank lots of wine.
She collapsed in a heap and was falling asleep.
I thought now was my chance,
I would finish her fine!
COURTNEY:When he picked up that stone,
I went right off my throne, screaming,
"FUCKED IF I KNOW WHAT IT IS WITH YOU MEN!"
And I kicked him so hard, that I knew he'd be scarred.
But it felt so damned good, I just did it again and again and again!

NICK:And she gave me a bloody nose!
Let me tell you, that woman's insane!
Had it coming to me, I suppose.
And I never messed with her again!
COURTNEY:No, he never messed wi'me again!
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MIKE - February 23, 2020 - Report this comment
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