"Tifa: May I have your attention please?

Aeris: May I have your attention please?

Tifa: Will CloudÆs real lady please stand up?

Aeris: I repeat: Will CloudÆs real lady please stand up?

Aeris & Tifa: WeÆre gonna have a problem hereà

Tifa: YÆall act like youÆve never seen a fine bar maid before,

Jaws all on the floor like me and Cloudy just burst through the door,

I started whoopin AerisÆs @$$ worse than before,

WeÆll never get divorced about somethinÆ over furniture.

Cloud: AHHHH!!!!

Aeris: ItÆs the return of the---

ôOh wait, no, wait, youÆre kiddingà

She didnÆt just say what I think she did, did she?ö

And my friend, Tifa saidà.

Nothing, lover-boy! SheÆll be dead soon and locked in my basement!

Tifa: Every other woman loves Cloudy-boy,

ôChigga, chigga, chigga, Cloud Strife,

I wanna hump with him, LOOK AT HIM ^_^

Walking around talking about you-know-what,

Staring at you-know-who!ö

Aeris: ôYeah, but heÆs so cute thoughàö æsighÆ

Cloud: (sweatdrops)

Tifa: Yeah, heÆs probably got a couple of screws up in his head loose,

But no worse that whatÆs goinÆ on in everybodyÆs bedroom

Everybody in the city: (sweatdrops)

Tifa: Sometimes I wanna just get in his bed and let loose,

But canÆt, but itÆs cool for Aeris to be hanging from a long noose!

Aeris: My staff is up her @$$!

My staff is up her @$$!

And if sheÆs lucky, IÆll probably pour her blood in a glass!

And thatÆs the message that we give to my lover-boy

And if Cloud and I screw now, weÆll both be screaming for joy!

Cloud: (sweatdrops)

Tifa: Of course, the whole worldÆll know about her work,

By the time the guys find out, Aeris will be givinÆ them free jerks!

We ainÆt nothin but mammalsà

Of course, thatÆs a different story when me and Cloud

screw in bed like animalsà ^_^

Aeris: But if they can f**k like different kinds of animals,

Then thereÆs no reason why Cloud and me canÆt elope.

Tifa: Grrà

Aeris: But if he feels I got, feels I got the antidote,

IÆll take off my pantyhose, and sing my chorus,

AND IT GOES!!!

Tifa: IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Aeris: IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Tifa: Sephy doesnÆt gotta cuss in his speech to kill people,

Well, nobody cares, so f**k him, and f**k the world too!

Sephiroth: (busts in) HEY!!! (gets kicked out by Cloud)

Tifa: Ya think I give a damn about my friend, Aeris?

Half of the fans canÆt even stomach her,

Let alone love her.

Aeris: But Cloud, we wonÆt be loud during our love making, right?

No, weÆll do it the hard way tonight: with all of our might! ^_^

Cloud: (sweatdrops)

Aeris: DonÆt go with that f**king slut over there, dude!

We can screw under the covers in the nudeà (smiles seductively)

Tifa: Why? So I can watch you guys have sex and curl up in fear?

I wonÆt let that slut get you drunk with her beer!

Little b***hàtrying to steal my only manà

I donÆt think so!!! IÆm gonna foil your dirty plan!!!

Aeris: I used to hear rumors in the street that Tifa was a hooker.

People used to say that she was quite the good looker!

IÆd never lie to you! You know itÆs true!

If you think itÆs a lie, then go talk to one of her clients named Lou!!!

Tifa: ThereÆs a million of woman that want to be with you,

cuss with you,

just donÆt give a f**k like you,

dress right for you,

walk, talk, and have sex with you.

ItÆll be tough, but in the end, you know IÆll be with you!

Aeris: IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Tifa: IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every otherf**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Aeris: HeÆs like a headtrip to listen to,

æcause heÆs only givin me things

Tifa jokes about with her friends inside her living room.

The only difference is that he has the balls to say in front of yÆall,

He doesnÆt have to be false, or sugar-coat it at all!

Tifa: He just lies in the bed and spits it,

And whether you like to admit it,

He can s**t it better than 90 percent of all of my fans out there!

Then you wonder how can kids eat up our video games like values!

Aeris: ItÆs funny, æcause at the rate weÆre goin when weÆre 30,

Cloud and meÆll be the only ones in the Nursing Home f**king.

HeÆll be pinching my @$$ while heÆs jacking off and jerkin,

But with me around, he wonÆt need a bag of viagra to stop workinÆ.

Cloud: (sweatdrops)

Tifa: Every other woman will be one of CloudÆs ladies lurkin,

She could be workinÆ at Meteor King,

Super Sizing his Meteor Rings,

Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming,

ôI donÆt give a f**k whether Cloud StrifeÆs taken or not!!!

Yuffie: (woke up a little while ago, overheard the entire thing, and interferes)

So will his real lady please stand up,

And put either one or both hands up,

And be proud for taking a chance and be out of control,

ONE MORE TIME, AS LOUD AS YOU CAN, HOW DOES IT GO?!?!?

Aeris: (very pissed) IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady are just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Tifa: (very pissed) IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Yuffie: (very proud) IÆm CloudÆs lady

Yes, IÆm his real lady

Every other f**king lady is just imitating,

So wonÆt CloudÆs real lady PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Cloud: (very politely)YouÆre all my ladies,

Yes, YouÆre all my real ladies,

Every other f**king lady is just imitating

So wonÆt all of you real ladies PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP,

PLEASE STAND UP!!!

Aeris: Boo hooà.. I guess CloudÆs ladies are everywhereà

Tifa: F**k it!!!

Yuffie: LetÆs all stand up! (smiles)

"