"May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real C-Dogg please have sex?
I repeat, will the real C-Dogg please have sex?
We're gonna have some booty here
Y'all act like ya never seen a white female whoar
Jaws all on the floor like Pam and Tommy did it on the floor
And started spankin her ass just like before
There were whoars, throwin' up on her furniture
It's the return of the...
""Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding, he just didn't do what I think he did, did he?""
And she said...
Nothing you idiots! She got head, she's locked in my bedroom!
Feminist women love C-Dogg
""(Blingbling) Doggie style, I want him
Look at him, walking around grabbing his you-know-what
Flipping the you-know-who, yeah, but he's so cute though""
Yeah, I proably got a couple of screws last night
But the worse is what's going on in your sister's bedroom
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for Carmen to grab her boobs
""My dick is on your lips, my dick is on your lips""
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little pricks
And expect them not to know what a whoar's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the HBO, don't they?
""We ain't nothing but mammals""
Well, some of us saw Hannibal
They cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump whoars and antelopes
Then there's is a damn good reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the anecdote
Women swing your panty-hoes, sing the chorus and it goes
Chorus:
I'm C-Dogg, yes I'm the real C-Dogg
All you other C-Dogg's are just mastubating
So won't the real C-Dogg please have sex?
Please have sex, please have sex
I'm C-Dogg, yes I'm the real C-Dogg
All you other C-Dogg's are just mastubating
So won't the real C-Dogg please have sex?
Please have sex, please have sex

'N SYNC don't gotta cuss in their shit to sell records
Well I do so ""Fuck them and fuck you too!""
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you women can't even get off on me let alone stand me
""But Dogg, what if you do her, wouldn't it be weird?""
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here
So you guys can set me up with Britney Spears
Shit Carson Daly better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears
And hear them argue over who's gonna give me head first
You little bitch, put me on hold on the phone last week
""Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's too skinny, hee-hee""
I should download her video on DVD and show the whole world
how you gave C-Dogg VD
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
All you do is annoy me so I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me; who just don't give a fuck like me
Who have sex like me; walk, talk and act like me
And it just might be the next best thing to being me!
Chorus
I'm like a head trip to listen to cuz I'm only giving you
Things you joke about with your hoes inside your bedroom
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be awesome or sugar coat it at all
I just get on a mic and spit it and whether you like to admit it
I just shitted better than 69 percent of you rappers out there
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums
It's funny cuz at the rate I'm going when I'm 60
I'll be the only pimp in the nursing home flirting
Pinching nurses asses when I'm jacking off or jerkin'
Said I'm jerkin' but this whole bag of Viagra is so not working
And every single person is a fake C-Dogg lurking
He could be working at Burger King ejaculating on your whopper
Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming ""I just fucked her!""
With his pants down and her panties off
So, will the real C-Dogg please get off?
And be proud to be outta ya mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?
Chorus x2
Ha ha
Guess there's a C-Dogg in all of us
Fuck it, let's all have sex"