I did time in rehab, did time in jail.
They say I'm crazy, but I won't fail,
'Cause I'm still ... winnin'.
Two pretty goddesses by my side.
Took my kids away, but I won't hide,
'Cause I'm still ... winnin'.

I pissed off all of my spouses, they're scared of me.
They take the money then they run.
I've taken any kind of drug that's ever been made.
Got me some hookers when I couldn't get laid.

But now I'm high on ... Sheen ... how I shine.
And I'm feelin' so fine.
Yes, I'm still whining. But I'm winning.

I'm a torpedo all full of rage.
In Detroit, I got booed off the stage.
But I'm still ... duh ... winnin'.
Liked it better on the radio
Where I couldn't see and didn't know
About the malice. Callous malice.

I been in Two and a Half Men for CBS.
Chuck Lorre, he can fuck himself.
Got the biggest TV salary that's ever been paid --
Only a fraction of what CBS made.
They're full of greed, vice, and slime.
But I'm biding my time.
'Cause I'm still winning. I'm not losing.