Song Parodies -> Old Man Shivers
"Old Man River" Based on the performance by Muslim Magomaev
"Old Man Shivers" Parody by Kirby Medway
Wrote this just after watching Showboat. No offence to anybody.
I'm an ol' man called Darren
And dere are young men dat I'd like to be in!
but I'm an ol' man and dat means I got troubles?
What should he care if he's too young for me?

Ol' man shivers,
Dem ol' man shivers
He keeps on sumpin'
While I am Bumpin,
He should just 'keeps rollin'
He don't keeps on rollin' along.

He always shatters,
He don't wear condoms,
An' dem dat plants'em
is soon forgotten,
But ol'man shivers,
He don't keeps rollin'along.

You an'me, we sweat an' strain,
Body all achin' an' racket wid pain,
Tote dat bulge!
Lick dem balls!
Rape a little punk
An' you land in jail.

Ah gits weary
An' sick of hurtin'
Ah'm tired of rootin'
An' skeered of squirtin',
But ol' man shivers,
He don' keep rolling' along.

I work on guys on de Mississippi,
Colored folks work while de white folks play,
Pullin' dose balls from de dawn to sunset,
Gittin' no rest till de dick blows.

Don't look up
An' don't look down,
You might just make
De white froth come round.
Bend your back
An' give me head,
An' pull dat dick
Until you' dead.

Let me go to the young men,
Let me go to the white man;
Show me dat white stream called de semen Jordan,
Dat's de ol' white stream dat I long to cross.

O' man shivers,
Dem ol' man shivers,
He mus' like humpin'
But don't say nuthin'
He jes' keeps rollin'
He keeps on rollin' along.

Long ol' white river forever keeps rollin' on...

He don' ever taste it,
He don' wear condoms,
An' dem dat plants 'em
Is soon forgotten,
but ol' man river,
He jes' keeps rollin' along.

Long ol' penis, keep pulling dat slong.
You an' me, we sweat an' strain,
Body all achin an' racked wid pain.
Tote dat bulge!
Lick dem balls!
Git 'em while dey drunk
An' you land in jail.

Ah gits weary
An' sick of hurtin'
Ah'm tired of rootin'
An' skeered of squirtin',
But ol' man shivers,
He don' keep rolling' along.
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