" Listening to my music
Watching my TV
Not gonna get off my seat
My pants are filled with pee
My stomach's
Overflowing
I am molding

My legs are old and crusty
My face looks like the moon
People often mistake my butt
As a big sand dune
Just look at my fanny-hole
I sure ain't no Daniel
Boone

My gut is exploding
My butt is eroding
I am, lazy
I am, lazy

Now when I stare in the mirror
It looks like I'm a goat
The only time I ever move, is to
Pick up the remote
Will you please pass
The garlic
Chips

I feel like a statue
My finger will match you
I am, lazy
I am, lazy

Now I'm takig aerobics
I think I'll be okay
But soon it will be closing time,
That means TV, Hooray

TV's still what I need
You will never change me
I am, lazy
I am, lazy
"