This is a song of pain
It hurts me just to sing
hemmorhoids
I did not desire
but I shit chili sauce through my ring of fire

Chorus:I'm shittin' chili sauce
through my burnin' ring of fire
and the turds fall out
and the water splashes higher
and it burns, burns, burns
my ring's on fire
my ring's on fire

My ass burns with the heat
of chili sauce and meat
I thought I'd made it mild
but oh, my butt burns wild

repeat chorus

Here I sit, at a total loss
about to shit more chili sauce
I bow my head to pray
that I don't blow my butt away