What time is it? You got 10 seconds to get to the bathroom..

Uuugh!

America, have you heard? There's a crappy new dance called the Turd.
You don't need no finesse, or no personality.
You just need some food and a laxative, now everybody grunt with me.

Come on now, uuugh
Hit the bathroom.
Wooooohh.
uugh.
Grab the Charmin.
Wooooohh.

Brothers, just be cool.
To do this dance, all ya do is drop the kids off at the pool.
Sisters, don't be shy.
Grab a beef burrito girls, then let your stool sample fly.

Come on now, uuugh
Hit the bathroom.
Wooooohh.
Y'all sing with me, goes like this,
Uugh!
Grab the Charmin.
Wooooohh.

Yes, hold on now, this dance ain't for everybody,
just the hungry people!

America, have you heard?
There's a crappy new dance called the Turd.
You don't need no finesse, or personality.
You just need some food and a laxative,
now everybody squeeze with me.

Uuugh!
Hit the bathroom
Wooooohh.
Uugh!
Grab the Charmin.
Wooooohh.

Alright! When the horns blow, I want everybody on the throne.
Just grab some food that's greasy, you won't need to push too hard.
James! I wanna order some chinese food.
Bulimic girls throwing up. Hey! Its coming out the wrong end!!

Did I leave a skidmark?
Fellas, y'all eat something.
I'll be back I gotta go pinch a loaf..

I pledge allegiance to the THRONE.
Can y'all say it with me? Sing it!
I pledge allegiance to the THRONE.

Ha Ha Ha Ha! Pass the Charmin.
Whooooh.

Fellas?
Whats the word? Uugh!
When your guts are crampin, what do you do?
Do the Turd!

Fellas?
Whats the word? Uugh!
When you're feeling bloated, what do you do?
Do theTurd!

America?
What's the word? Uugh!
When a turtle head is poking, what do you do?
Do the Turd!

Pinch it off!

Uuugh!!