Ooh I've got the biggest one, biggest one.
Someday you will win me a prize, Shillelagh.
Ooh you make my woman come, my woman come.
In the front or in the behind, Shillelagh.
Never does it flop for a slut with a dirty mind,
It's always sticking up from my crotch, like a yard of pine,
My-ee my-ee my-ee ahee ah woo!
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh.

Come a little closer, over here,
Close enough to ride my king size Shillelagh.
Rub your pussy gel on me, swellin' me
Every bit as long as my thigh, Shillelagh.
Never does it flop for a slut with a dirty mind,
It's always sticking up from my crotch, like a yard of pine,
My-ee my-ee my-ee ahee ah woo!
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh,
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh,

(1st guitar solo)

When they gonna measure me, measure me?
Show the world you reach to the sky, Shillelagh!
Bigger than Ron Jeremy, Jeremy,
Or any average random black guy, Shillelagh.
Never does it flop for a slut with a dirty mind,
It's always sticking up from my crotch, like a yard of pine,
My-ee my-ee my-ee ahee ah woo!
Ma ma ma ma ma ma ma ma
Myee my-ee my-ee ahee ah woo!
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh
Ma ma ma my Shillelagh

(2nd guitar solo)

Ooooh ah my Shillelagh
Ooooh ah my Shillelagh
Ooooh ah my Shillelagh