(Instrumental Intro)

Forgive me if my fantasies might seem a little hard porn
I've done most of this stuff before, I wonder if I'm off norm
Like to watch the skin flicks of girls going one-on-one
'Cause since I am an old fart I need help to make me cum

It's not firm enough, a full erection's tough
If I watch this stuff
Might get hard, I trust
Going there, Dyke Bar

I've been there several times this year
The women seemed so strange, but it made me rigid
While staring with my eyes at one
I flashed that there was no way she was frigid
And then she said, "I want you bad"
But I couldn't get it hard at all; no, not at all
I didn't know quite what to do so she left me standing there
My nuts were turning blue

Dyke Bar, to be there makes me horny
Dyke Bar, exciting stuff to me
Dyke Bar, I remember that one evening
When the first thing that I did there
Was to stroke it up so you could see me get hard

I'd like a three-some with you
And your girl friend in a place that's just around the block
If we jumped in bed together
I am really sure that I would get a rigid cock
That thought has got me creamin' girl
It's been so long I thought that I'd forgotten how
It's hard although I am so old
You touched it, yes, you touched it, made it large, oh wow

Dyke Bar, to be there makes me horny
Dyke Bar, exciting stuff to me
Dyke Bar, I remember that one evening
When the first thing that I did there
Was to stroke it up so you could see me get hard

(Instrumental break)

Dyke Bar, to be there makes me horny
Dyke Bar, exciting stuff to me
Dyke Bar, I remember that one evening
When the first thing that I did there
Was to stroke it up so you could see me get hard

Yeah, my member on that evening
Sure got stroked enough
I really shot a large wad...