"Ground floor: First through Third, Physical Education, Home Economics.
Oh! Good morning, Mr. Rogers. Coming... down?"

"Heh heh heh heh heh!"

Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm,
Mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm mmm;

Yikes!

Shipped the principal off to Iran; (Whoa!)
Hope she likes the company! (Oh, yeah!)
No one heard the coach was retirin'; (Whoa!)
Got deported from the country! (Oh, no!)
They left me to cook their books;
The superintendent's blind;
A little redhead girl is givin' me looks
That really blow my mind!

Lovin' a second grader;
Lookin' her up though I'm lookin' down.
Lovin' a second grader;
Hopin' I don't get run out of town!

Office in the schoolhouse basement; (Whoa!)
Lookin' kinda threadbare. (Oh well.)
Askin' me about her placement; (Whoa!)
"Teacher, can I meet you down there?" (Whoa, hey!)
Well sweetie, my office sucks:
Just my sofa, desk, and I.
She says "Your sofa and your desk'll be perfect, baby,
For what I'd like to try!"

Lovin' a second grader;
Feelin' my heart like a thrash beat pound,
Lovin' a second grader;
Leadin' me down to the underground!

Gimme air! Gimme air!
Is it me, or is it hot down there?
Lovin' a second grader;
Lovin' a girl close to the ground!

(Lovin' a--)

(Second grader!)

(Whoa, boy! Down!)

Lovin' a second grader;
Breakin' some rules on the schoolhouse ground,
Lovin' a second grader;
Hopin' down here that we won't be found.

Gonna be a jailbait chaser; (Whoa!)
Gonna be a fugitive! (Uh oh!)
I'm gonna be her file eraser; (Whoa!)
I'm somethin' they won't forgive. (Oh no!)
Gotta keep this outta sight;
She's the cutest girl in my class!
Just make out all your tests with a pencil, honey;
I'll make sure you pass!

Lovin' a second grader;
Lovin' her up while I'm stoopin' down,
Lovin' a second grader;
She and I may have to blow town!

Got no pair! Got no pair!
She's as flat as a board under there!
Lovin' a second grader;
Trippin' me up as she knocks me down.

Got no hair! Got no hair!
I mean, underneath her neck: down there!
Lovin' a second grader;
Sits on my chest when I hit the ground.

Gimme air! Gimme air!
Baby, hold off, hold off, hold off, hold off!

Lovin' a second grader;
Got no defense when she takes me down.

Gimme air! Gimme air!
Honey, no more, no more, no more, no more!

Lovin' a second grader;
For this I'm probably Hell-bound.

Gimme air! Gimme air!
Sweetie, not there, not there, not there, not there!

Lovin' a second grader;
For this I'm probably goin' down.

No, not there! No, not there!
No, not there! No, not there!

Lovin' a second grader;
Darling, get up! Please don't hold me down...